Dark Days!

Help! I think I am being blackmailed!

Someone is posing as Sirius - one of our exciting visitors - and is offering me bribes of fun and frolics to access liquor! At least, I think it's not the real Sirius.

Oh No! What if it is the real Sirius and he really does want me to get him free booze in return for fun? I have been warned by a friend that this "Sirius" is not to be trusted, but I though they were exagerating!

What to do, what to do???? This is making my brain ache. I like fun, I really do, but I'm not at all sure that Sirius intends to pay for the liquor. What will Mum and Dad say?

Then again, they have invited Sirius, and surely they wouldn't do that if he was....well...a liquor-fiend! I thought he was a charity ambassador, which sounds impressively cool, but I must be wrong!

I think I am going to have to go and chew something, to get inspiration for solving my dilemma!


ps. today I have stolen one bra, two bits of tissue, an empty pork scratchings bag (boy, got in trouble for that one!) and a flower pot.

Wow Wow Wow Wow!!!

I am so excited I could BURST!

We have got Very Important Visitors coming! It's going to be fabulously wonderful! They're going to visit, and we're going to have fun, and there will be high jinx and excitement!

They are called "Sirius" and "Sir Parsley" and I have been told that I am absolutely under no circumstances whatsoever to so much as lick them, let alone take them to my bed and chew them. I am shocked! As if I would do that to a visitor!

Mum says I will learn more about them between now and the visit, but that they are doing Important Charity Work (whatever that is - I hope it's fun fun fun!).

ps. sorry for not blogging for so long, but I am such a busy dog that I often get distracted by life, customers, you name it!

pps. today I have stolen a plastic bag, two socks and a plastic bottle cap